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The Gottman Method of couples therapy is a popular and research-based approach to improving relationships, developed by Drs. John and Julie Schwartz Gottman. This method is grounded in over four decades of research on relationships and aims to help couples strengthen their emotional bond and improve communication. The Gottman Method incorporates practical tools and interventions to promote healthier dynamics, reduce conflict, and foster mutual respect and understanding.

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Key Principles of the Gottman Method:

  1. The Sound Relationship House Theory: The Gottman Method is structured around a framework called the Sound Relationship House, which includes several layers of healthy relationship building. The idea is to create a relationship that is stable, secure, and emotionally fulfilling.

    • Build Love Maps: This refers to developing a deep understanding of your partner’s inner world—knowing their hopes, dreams, fears, preferences, and daily life details. The better you know each other, the better you can meet each other's needs.

    • Share Fondness and Admiration: This involves expressing appreciation, respect, and affection for your partner. Positive reinforcement helps to nurture the relationship and reminds you of why you are together.

    • Turn Toward Each Other, Not Away: This concept emphasizes the importance of responding to your partner’s bids for connection. Every small gesture—whether it's a shared joke or a simple request for attention—can reinforce your emotional bond.

    • The Positive Perspective: Seeing your partner through a positive lens, especially in times of conflict, helps couples maintain a more optimistic view of their relationship.

    • Manage Conflict: Conflict is inevitable, but managing it constructively is key. The Gottman Method encourages couples to learn how to cope with differences, prevent gridlocked issues, and turn arguments into opportunities for deeper understanding.

    • Make Life Dreams Come True: This principle helps couples navigate the process of pursuing personal and shared goals. A successful relationship supports both partners’ aspirations.

    • Create Shared Meaning: This involves building a shared sense of purpose, culture, and rituals that add depth and significance to the relationship.

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